Is it normal to miss your booty call?
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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