Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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