So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
