i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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