I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
