what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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