I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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