Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
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I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
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U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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