grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Randomize
