Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize