yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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