Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
