She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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