wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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