The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
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