Please, let me fuck your mom
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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