Sacagawea was the original milf.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize