Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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