Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Randomize