i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
