why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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