Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
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