there was a trapeze. enough said
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
