dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize