Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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