why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize