remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
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