I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
