i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
