We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
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high people should be assigned attendants
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
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My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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