***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
this will be a night to untag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
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