So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize