What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
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