You're my little dorito
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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