There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
