Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
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