My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
