I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
