It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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