Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Randomize
