Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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