sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
just tell him i said nine months
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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