first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
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