You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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