got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
