I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Randomize
