Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
