we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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