So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
