Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
My life is pants optional.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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